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expression “there’s more
than one way to skin a
cat.” Which begs the
question; just how many
ways are there? In our
quest to find the answer
we’ve compiled this
(untested) list of
range from “horse” to “rodent.”
2. Ginsu knives. They never need sharpening.
3. Infect the cat with a skin-eating virus.
4. Scare it with a loud noise that makes it literally
jump out of its skin.
5. Slowest method: Potato peeler.
6. Fastest method: Chain saw (if you don’t want
any part of the skin--or the cat--to remain intact.
7. Mix catnip with ground glass. Spread on floor.
8. Hold cat by tail, dip into a vat of acid just long
enough to dissolve the skin.
9. Freeze the cat, chip off skin with an ice pick.
10. Microwave on “high” for twelve minutes, peel
away burnt skin.
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